Your greatest calling

Laundry, work, phone calls, and more laundry.

In the middle of it all, my 6 year old asks me to help her draw a cat.

Without thinking I begin to spout off my to-do list.  To a 6 year old.  To my 6 year old.

As I am running down the list of important things, I see her face.  She is not impressed. She doesn't care. She just hears "not now", "maybe later", and "I have more important things to do".  More important than you.

She won't remember the time that her mom was so busy.  She will just remember that I said no and she didn't get to draw her cat.

All of those people on my to-do list, they don't love me the way she does. So she should be the most important.

They won't remember how important you are.  They will remember how important they weren't.

So draw. Build. Play. Sing. Remind them how important they are.

that night. the night my soul met god.

i've always known god. but it wasn't until that night that i really met him.

it was a night full of pain. the kind of pain that reaches into your soul and steals everything sacred.

i stumbled down the sidewalk. it was late at night. i was lost. truly lost. in a matter of seconds, hopeless had it's death grip on my neck. i was suffocating. could not breathe.

and that night.

late that night, walking aimlessly up and down the street in my pajamas with no shoes on, i met him for the first time.

he found me. i found him.

that night.

when the pain is my worship.

i've been seeing and understanding that God uses *all* for a purpose.  ALL.

we miss out on so much when we resist the ugly in our story.  let him be the creator, again.  transforming the burnt, left over ashes into beauty. beauty with a voice that beckons us to accept his grace and love.  let him create something from nothing.  he can do it, you know.

for even if the mountains walk away and the hills fall to pieces, my love won't walk away from you, my covenant commitment of peace won't fall apart. the God who has compassion on you says so. isaiah 54:10