locking arms

love this quote from beth moore:

some of us with little previous battle experience have no idea why God is allowing us to go through such difficult times in a place we thought was His will. He’s trying to make warriors out of us, girlfriend!  rise to the occasion!  but we aren’t meant to fight unseen forces alone. you and i have the God-given right to lock arms with our sisters and brothers in Christ and defend ourselves with the Sword of the Spirit and the Shield of Faith. . .when we do, we are guaranteed victory.

i am in the battle. and i have very little previous experience.

i'm beginning to see, though, that He is allowing injury so one day i can boast in my battle scars.  for His glory.  He is shaping me, very carefully. with delicate care. and time. He is taking His time with me.  paying close attention to detail. 

details that i would have rushed by in my haste to regain what i lost. what i think i need.

but He's transforming me. by renewing my mind. 

thankfully, i am not fighting these forces alone. . . i am surrounded.

surrounded by you. encouraged by you.   

and on the days when i don’t believe, you do. when i run out of strength, you hoist me up on your shoulders and carry me. when my spirit is low, you sustain me with your prayers. when i want to stop believing, you remind me of His faithfulness.

your encouraging words. your prayers. wiping the teardrops from my eyes. an extra tight hug.   

we are locking arms.

we will survive.  we are guaranteed victory.  He told me so.

Recalculating

10 years ago if you would have asked me where I saw myself today, my answer would be far different than the reality in which I find myself right now.

And that's a good thing.

You know when you start cleaning and 30 minutes in, you look around the house and find that it is way messier than when you started? 

Gotta dig all the junk out, put it out in the open and THEN start the process of cleaning up. 

Kinda works that way in life too. 

At times I look around and think, ok God, I'm doing what you told me and it looks like I am further away than when I started. 

It's a process that requires obedience and faith. 

Obedience and faith. 

Obedience and faith.

Have you ever made a wrong turn while being navigated by the GPS? Then you hear it kindly announce that it is "recalculating".

The only thing I need to do is trust that my GPS knows where it's going ... and  listen to it's instructions.

My trusty little friend always finds a way to get me back on the right path.  Whether that means a u-turn, 2 additional left turns, or having to go 5 (or 25) miles out of my way...The destination stays the same, but the route I take to get there changes.

Similarly, when we mess-up, forget, sleep-in, rebel, or run out of steam ... instead of continuing on this path of forgetfulness, rebellion, or self-dependance ... we are called to recalculate...and keep going.

We need to trust that He knows what He is doing ... and we need to listen to His instructions.

It may take us longer to get there; we may have to take some bumpy, back roads; we may need to slow down and reevaluate our travel speed.

But we will still get there ... with obedience and faith.

Job 23

He knows where I am and what I've done.

I've followed Him closely, my feet in His footprints,

not once swerving from His way.

I've obeyed every word He's spoken.

And not just obeyed, but treasured His advice.

He'll complete in detail what He's decided about me.

God's Decree

I have been on a journey the past two years.  The journey has had many seasons.  Each one different, and completely necessary.

I must be honest and say that I am tired of journeying.  My spirit is exhausted.  I beg God to simply resolve my heart to be whole again.  But He doesn't.  Not yet.

I am ready to be better.  But the problem is, I'm not actually better yet.

The yet to be seen, still not revealed "purpose in the pain" has been my lifeline.

But it's hard because I am not the one painting the picture.  He is.

And it might take Him a really. long. time.

Ironically, healing is painful.  At times the pain is unbearably numbing.  I'm not sure which is worse - the pain or the numbness.

I remember vividly the God breathed moments in the beginning.  He spoke to me and prepared me for the journey I was about to begin.  His voice brought security.  He allowed this.  His Words were clear and loud.  His Words sustained me.

His Words:

Isolation.

Armor of God.  

Obedience.   

But now there's only silence.

"My" verse is Jeremiah 29:11: 

"I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out- plans to take care of you, not abandon  you, plans to give you the future you hope for. When you call on me, when you come and pray to me, I'll listen.  When you come looking for me, you'll find me. Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I'll make sure you won't be disappointed. 

God's Decree.  

I'll turn things around for you.  

I'll bring you back from all the countries into which I drove you.  

God's Decree 

I will bring you home to the place from which I sent you off into exile.  You can count on it."

True Beauty

My 5 year old loves to look at herself in the mirror.

She sneaks peeks at herself while sitting on her bed talking to me.  She stops when she walks by the hall mirror, looks, flips her hair, and keeps on going.  She will stand in the bathroom for long periods of time, dancing & looking, singing & looking, talking & looking.

In my eyes she is one of the most beautiful little girls in the whole.wide.world.
(It's a three-way tie.)

But I must confess,

I worry about the years to come. What will this beauty bring?

Will she always look in the mirror and see beauty?

Will she glorify her beauty at the expense of something more valuable ....
  Like patience, joy, peace, or kindness?

Or, perhaps, will she detest her beauty, and long for something else ....
For sleek black hair and dark ember eyes?

These are just some of the things that worry me about raising this little mirror-kissing-goddess.


Needing to feel beautiful is a God-given desire which distinguishes our feminine heart.  We don't want to be admired exclusively for our outer beauty, nor do we want it dismissed.  One without the other is not really who we are.

What we really long for is for someone to be enchanted with our entire being, our very essence.

I wonder if there is a way to help her find the real meaning of beauty,

long before the years of angst begin.

Before fashion magazines and teen peers and self-image woes.

Can I show her by the way I live, that
beauty is much more than a pretty face and designer clothes?

(Before she is much too cool for me)

Can I show her that beauty is all around....

in the tiny ladybug and the cloudless day.

in the smallest snowflake and the tallest trees.

in a multitude of words and the refuge of silence.

I will try to show her that beauty is...
in the loving way you hold the hurting.
in the loyalty of friendship.
in a smile to the discouraged.
in friendship to the friendless.

in the warm acceptance of differences.

I pray she always knows, she is treasured, she is sacred, she is His.  She is beautiful!

Cuffs and Cardigans

It happens every time.

Without fail, whenever I am packing to go away, I end up bringing entirely too much.  I can't help it though.  What if we go to a fancy restaurant?  What if it gets cold?  What if it rains? What if I spill something and need a backup?  What if Justin Timberlake is staying at our hotel? I'll need to look beee--yoooo-teee-fulllll!

Sometimes I feel like an Oscar Awards host with all my wardrobe options.

So I perused the internet and came up with some fabulous basic mix and match pieces that are a must have on your next trip, and in your closet.  Quality not quantity.

1.  A neutral tee.  White is flexible, but black, gray, or light pink are great too.  Make sure it covers your rear when you sit down.  Please.   Here is a great option from J Crew.

2.  A cardigan.  Liven it up a bit with some color. Something that will work with a pair of jeans but also a spring skirt.  Here are a few style ideas incorporating the cardigan by JCrew.

3.  A cute non-tee.  A blouse or top that is a little more polished and feminine.  Look for pieces that can stand on their own or go under your jacket - something dressier than a tshirt.  Love this little ensemble by Ann Taylor.

4.  A sundress that can double as a pool/beach cover-up.  Something cute and feminine and not too clingy.  You don't want to have to "suck-in" the tummy all day long. 

5.  A great pair of jeans.  My fave pair is from Gap.  Gotta have comfy jeans, skinny jeans, and a nice tailored pair. 

6.  A pencil skirt.  Love this one from Banana Republic.

7.  A killer pair of heels.  You might feel like detaching your feet before the night is over, but rest assured, you looked fabulous!  Check out some fab shoes from DSW.  (I couldn't choose just one!)

I think these are simple and stunning.

These are equally fabulous and springy!

LOVE these!

And last but not least...check out this hot little pair.

8.  You need a great pair of sandals ... the right pair will work great with jeans, shorts, skirt, dress ... you name it.  This is a super cute pair from Gap. 

9.  Accessorize. Add a bracelet or chunky necklace to any basic piece and it's instant glam.  I love this cuff bracelet from Piperlime.  It's only $36!

10.  A great handbag can totally rescue you from blahville.  I LOVE THIS handbag from Urban Outfitters.