Here's the challenge: Write for 5 minutes flat without editing my voice. Today's topic is "forgetting".
Go.
It's a delicate balance. I find myself rushing them. Rushing them to sleep through the night. Rushing them to crawl. Rushing them to walk. Rushing them to use the potty. Rushing. Rushing. Rushing.
But once they accomplish those milestones, I miss them. I miss the snuggly little newborn nestled in my neck. I miss the sweet smell. I miss the warm blankets. I miss the first smiles. The first words. The first time she locks eyes with me and knows that she is safe, because she is in Mama's arms.
I ache because I don't want to forget. I want to remember.
But time continues to rush by. And I am it's enabler.
I want to savor every single moment.
The silliness between sisters in the bathtub. (Even if it makes a huge mess.)
The last day of kindergarten. (Even if it makes me cry.)
The stubborn two year old who insists on dressing herself - and getting stuck in her shirt every time. (Even if it takes a little longer than it should.)
The inquisitive three year old who asks so many questions. (Even if I'm tired of talking.)
I carry my camera and attempt to capture the moments. To make them stand still forever. So that I won't forget.
I want to remember. I can't imagine forgetting.
I know EXACTLY what you mean. My children are 5, 3 1/2, and 2--it's been chaotic, and I tend to want them to take the next steps toward independence, but I don't want to miss the beauty right now, either.
ReplyDelete